Future Thoughts
by laurzz
Summary: DannyLindsay. post-ep for 9x05. "I know," she smiled softly as she stood on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his nose. "I love you for being you; thanks for coming to save me from myself." "You don't gotta thank me for that, Montana. There isn't anywhere else I'd rather be than wiping away your tears."


**So NY go ahead and just break my heart, okay? Wait, oh, you didn't feel the need to wait for my permission? Okay that's fine too. What is it with NY this season and breaking my heart with children? It's like they knowwwww. ****Also, Flack? I adore you. Literally. Adoration. I absolutely LOVE these episodes where they are going to focus on their days off. Because omfg. it is amazing. And so strange to have known and loved characters for nine years (or you know, five, whatever.) and still be learning things about them. It's such a good move on the writer's part. I definitely, definitely like the direction this season.**

**And finally, how flawless was Anna? Yup. And can I just say I loved how many scenes she was in. And an interrogation? it's like it's Christmas come early. so, speaking of... flawless Anna played right into my hands for the post-ep. It's a little different, but I'm pretty pleased with how it's turned out I think. I wasn't sure initially and half way through writing it I stopped and was like ugh, no... but I powered through and it all came together nicely. I hope you'll agree. **

**Huge thank you to those of you who reviewed and read last post-ep. It seems like a million years ago now because I've had a week off school for half-term yaaay! Special mentions to: abovetherim, MesserFamilyFan100, Dantana15, Sweetlilloz, webdlfan, Lulubell76, CTI-Jenn, gigglesforcsi, DL-Shipper34, saderia, Alex Joleta, 18lzytwner, LoveShipper, Grace Mathilda, Ilovethecubs and Kris is treble. **

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**1 new message**

_Going to the gym, don't wait for me. _

Narrowing his eyes at his cell phone, Danny looked up from his desk and furrowed his brow. He looked back down to the message he'd just received and checked it was from the right person. Lindsay? Going to the gym? What? He almost laughed. Lindsay and gyms weren't something that usually went together. She often talked about being lucky. A few games of Tennis in the summer months and Mommy and daughter swimming lessons with Lucy kept her slim shape. He really didn't pay much attention when she started up about how much she weighed and whether or not she fit into her old clothes. To him, she was his wife and he loved her. Not her size. If she put weight on, there was more of her to love. If she lost weight… well, nine times out of ten he didn't even know. And the one time he did notice would be her telling him… so really. It was a mute point.

But one thing that was a constant was that Lindsay didn't like the gym. As confident as she was… she didn't like being looked at. She hated getting hot and she detested spending time in the gym when she could be at home with her little girl.

He, on the other hand was a gym buff. He liked a good workout. He liked the whole getting hot and feeling the burn after a good workout. It was one of the very few things that they had differing opinions on. But, Lindsay fully appreciated his weekly trips to the gym… when he could at least. He'd been slacking off for the past few months, but on the whole it was just something else that fit into his weekly routine.

Seeing Jamie walk past the window, he cleared his throat and quickly stood from his chair. He pulled open the door and called out to her. When she turned, he gestured her back into his office.

"Detective Messer, what's up?"

"I told you already, call me Danny."

Offering her new colleague a smile, she playfully rolled her eyes. "Okay, what's up Danny?"

"I was just wondering… you were with Linds in interrogation right; with Mitch?"

"Correct."

"How was she?"

Jamie pursed her lips together. "How do you mean?"

"Did she seem… upset?"

Jamie narrowed her eyes and twisted her lips together as she thought back to the time in interrogation. Danny could see the thought process on her face, and he knew the inevitable answer… he was just waiting for confirmation.

"Actually now that you mention it, Lindsay was a little upset. She controlled herself really well, but she was seriously mad at one point. Mitch said something about being like any other normal person, and she was very adamant that he was the worst kind of person… she was really angry now come to think of it. Why, is everything okay?"

Danny felt his heart drop. He knew exactly where he'd find Lindsay. "Yeah, she's fine." He lied. "I just had a feeling… it always helps to have intel. It's what makes me such a fabulous husband."

"One of your many talents, I'm sure." She smiled before turning on her heel. "Keep an eye on her, Danny. In all seriousness, she's going to need a few hugs tonight I think," Jamie said. "I like her a lot; it's nice to have someone so down to earth as Lindsay in a testosterone fuelled workplace."

"If I had a quarter for the amount of times she's said that to me." Danny smiled as he grabbed his jacket, keys and cellphone from his desk. "I hate to be rude but…"

"No, it's fine I need to go and speak to Mac anyway about this report. Some guy stopped me and started questioning me about his wife though…"

"Alright, alright," Danny smirked as he switched the lights off in the office. "Everyone likes themselves for a comedian."

"You do what you can," Jamie winked before heading down the hallway and disappeared out of sight.

Taking a deep breath, Danny began his journey first to the locker room, ready to put the pieces back together in his wife's heart.

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She was hot. She didn't like being hot. She hurt. She didn't like hurting. She ached. She definitely didn't like aching. She was confused whether her eyes were burning with tears or with sweat. She figured both. She wanted to go home but she wasn't ready for that yet. She wanted to murder the son of a bitch that had sat opposite her in the interrogation room… With each thwack to the mannequin, Lindsay felt herself releasing a fraction of the anger that she had felt over the course of today.

She wasn't somebody who often went to the gym. She'd gone when she and Danny had been dating, but that was purely because she had wanted to spend even those moments with Danny… and she knew that watching him at the gym wouldn't do any harm. But left to her own devices, she would prefer to go and eat dessert at their favourite diner with their daughter than work out.

When she had text Danny, it had been a hint for him to come and find her because even though she wanted to work through her upset and anger alone, she also needed him with her. He always made things better. But until he arrived like she hoped that he would, she'd just have to settle for beating the crap out of the punch bag that hung in front of her.

Her punches were gaining momentum and she had to dodge the swinging bag quite a few times. She didn't care though, it all added to the release of her pent up frustration with the world. How could that monster have done what he did to the perfect little boy? How could anyone do that to a child? The thought of someone even laying a finger on Lucy made her feel sick. The last time someone had, she'd shot them dead. And she'd do it again. Twice for good measure if she had enough bullets. She'd protect her daughter to the death, literally. And watching Mitch whatever his name was across from her, claim that he was 'normal' and 'just like anyone else' made her sick to her stomach. He was the worst kind of person. He was the one that you knew lurked in the shadows, posing and convincing them that they were normal. And they were, on the whole, normal… until they weren't anymore. They were the ones that acted randomly and they were the ones that nobody expected, or suspected the crime was committed. They posed as the nice guys, the ones that helped the grieving parents and the shocked neighbourhood… when really; they are the sole reason for such devastation and despair.

Lindsay didn't hate many people… but she hated those types. Those types had killed her four friends when she was younger. Those types had caused her sleepless nights from crime scenes that she couldn't shake from her mind and those types were the types that scared the motherly instinct within her to no end.

After spending the afternoon with Flack a few weeks ago, Lucy had been desperate for a dog. Just like Flack's to be precise. She'd begged, left little drawings around the house of them being a happy family with a dog. She'd written little notes promising to be the best dog mommy ever. In short, Danny was gunning for Flack's head on a platter for putting the idea into her head. But the thing that had left a resounding thump in Lindsay's chest after today was that Lucy's main promise was that she'd walk the dog all the time; 'by herself if she had to'. By herself? By herself? After today? Lindsay hated herself for it, but the only pet Lucy was getting any time soon was a stick insect… and she'd like it. That girl of her's was going nowhere by herself. Nowhere. Ever.

She knew she was being overprotective by her knuckles desperately hurting her. She'd increased her punches probably by tenfold, but she didn't care. She wasn't finished. She had a lot more she had to deal with yet.

She sounded like Danny, and a part of her now understood and appreciated where Danny had been coming from. She'd always had an overwhelming urge to protect her daughter, but after today and being able to relate to something that a grieving parent could… it hit far too close to home for Lindsay.

She closed her mind for a moment as she directed her assault of the mannequin. With every thump to the punching bag, she could feel the tears fill in her eyes. Faces came to her mind from the course of her day. Poor Tommy, Tommy's parents, Keith Milner… and _him_.

In between her thwacks to the punch bag and her sobs, she heard the gym door creak open. She didn't need to look to know who it was. No one in their right minds would be coming for a work out at eight thirty. She didn't falter in her punches though.

"You're a scrappy little thing," the voice whispered before standing opposite her and taking a film hold of the punch bag. He'd changed into his work-out clothes but something about him told her that this wasn't just a coincidence that he'd found her there.

She stopped her punches to the bag momentarily and looked at him through her tearful eyes. He offered her a supportive smile before gesturing down to the punch bag between the two of them. Without needing a second invitation, Lindsay began thumping the mannequin that Danny was holding in place for her.

"Let it all out," he whispered softly.

She applied one last thump to the bag before collapsing against in and burying her head in the red, spongy material. She heaved for breaths initially before her tears overtook her need to do anything else and she felt herself burst into a flood of tears. She'd somehow wrapped her arms around the punch bag initially but soon taking residence in her arms was the strong, protective arms of her husband, wasting no time in wrapping her up tight in his arms. She buried her head into his neck and let her hot tears litter his skin. She inhaled his scent and felt herself instantly calm down… but she was far from her usual self.

Despite all the things he could say, Danny said nothing while he held her. She figured that he knew she was battling with a lot of thoughts swirling around in her head, and he was probably thinking that she didn't need anything else added to them. But she needed to hear his voice.

Pressing a kiss to the juncture of his neck and shoulder, Lindsay let her lips linger there for a moment before deciding to take the well travelled path up to his jaw line and then to his lips. He welcomed her advances and picked her up off the floor slightly, letting her wrap her legs around his torso as she did so. She didn't need to break away as she ripped off the gloves that had protected her hands. She threw them to the floor and instantly laced her fingers in his hair as she pulled him close. He stumbled backwards, hitting both of them with the punch bag as he tried to find his balance. He took a few more steps back before he hit the wall. After steadying himself there for a few moments, he carefully slid them down the wall, letting Lindsay finally sit facing him on his lap. In their movements, they'd not broken their intense kiss once, and Danny was beginning to feel the need to get some oxygen into his lungs. He pulled away momentarily and before Lindsay could lean forward and capture his lips again, he buried his head into the juncture of her neck and began placing soft kisses to her sensitive skin. It rendered her speechless, and he could feel, and see her desperately trying to catch her breath, both from her exertion of her impromptu workout and their unexpected kiss.

"I'm sorry… you're… so upset." He whispered against her skin in between kisses.

Feeling the need for more of him, she adjusted on his lap and boldly grinded against his crotch.

"Linds…" he muttered against his skin. "Not… here."

"Here."

"There's cameras!" He implored, breaking away from her neck. "And you're upset."

"So?" she sniffled, wiping her eyes, smudging her mascara. "It hasn't stopped us before."

"We're in the middle of the gym," he whispered. "Granted no one else is here, but baby, I'm all for comforting you but not here, okay? Don't you think you need to talk about whatever's upset you first?"

"We can talk about it after," she whispered.

"Baby…"

"No," she insisted as she pressed a kiss to his lips. "I don't want to talk about it."

"But you want to have sex right here?" he implored. "Baby, come on… you know this isn't you. You're upset. You're emotional… and you definitely don't want the cameras to record what's going to end up happening."

"I just don't want to feel this," she whispered, laying her head against his chest. "I'm scared and upset over something that hasn't even happened to me. How is that fair? How is that even viable?"

"Because you're human and you can relate to their pain. It's okay to feel scared and upset. I'm upset. I'm angry too… we deal with things differently. _Very _differently today." He smirked. "But you know that you need to talk about this. Whether it's now or when we get home."

"I need to feel like me again though," she whispered as she locked her fingers around his gym shirt.

"It was hard to compartmentalise today," he said softly as he pressed a kiss to her temple. "What with Lucy going on and on and on about wanting a dog recently… we had almost no chance of getting through today unscathed. But that's not a bad thing, Montana. It's something that helps to remind us that we're human and things can still affect us."

"I shouldn't have let it upset me though."

"Why not?" he implored. "You don't choose to let things upset you, baby. They just do. You can't help it."

"I should have a better lid on my emotions."

"You've been spending too much time with Mac," he smirked playfully. "Listen, let's go home okay? Let's go home, make dinner and be normal people… not detectives that just solved a twenty year murder investigation."

"I don't want to be normal," she whispered. "That monster said he was normal, and if he's normal, I don't want to be normal."

"Okay, let's just be us. How does that sound?"

She nodded against him and buried her head into his neck as she let silent tears slip down her cheeks.

"I sense there's something more here," he nudged the information from her. "What else is on your mind?"

"I don't know," she whimpered. "I… I…"

"Shall I tell you what I think?"

She nodded against him.

"I reckon that today has made you realise that things aren't very nice anymore. Whether you live in a close knit neighbourhood or an apartment building where no one gives a shit, bad things happen to good people. It scares you in that we're deciding whether or not to join one of those close knit communities out in the suburbs, or whether to stay in an apartment building where no one gives a crap. It scares you that a decision you thought you were making for the best, may not be the best at all."

She nodded against him.

"You saw yourself today. It doesn't happen often; sometimes you can see bits of you in other people's lives… but today, you saw us. You saw you and I stood on the doorstep of our house in a perfect neighbourhood and you saw Lucy with a dog. You saw us in Lewis' footsteps and you don't want to follow them and the life they ended up having. You want to protect Lucy, and you have done, so many times… but the Lewis'… they were just unlucky. Desperately unlucky. Wherever we decide to move, Linds, we'll be okay."

"How do you know that?"

"Because," he said softly. "I've seen Taken 2 and I could do all that shit that Neeson does with my eyes closed. If anything happens to you or Lucy, I've got it covered, don't you be worryin' about that."

Despite herself, Lindsay felt a little giggle bubble up from her chest.

"There we go," he whispered, moving her face towards him with an index finger tucked under her chin. "That's what I've been waiting for." He said as he basked in her smile. With the pads of his thumbs, he wiped away her mascara and tears and then wiped them on his sweatpants. "You're beautiful, you know that right?"

"I'm sweaty, hot, and crying with mascara down my face probably. You're full of bull."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I'll have you know." He smirked. "Listen, I know today was hard okay? But that's the Lewis' life. They got their beautiful son for just eight years. We might have Lucy for thirty five years. We might have her for fifty years. We just don't know okay? But if we live like that, where's the fun? Why worry about losing her, while we have her? Who's to say she won't outlive us? We're worrying over something that is out of our control, sweetheart. I love you, but you need to just step back and appreciate the fact that our life is good. Lucy is safe… and we know now to never agree to get her a dog." He added in jest. "Maybe we can get her a goldfish or something."

"I was thinking more along the lines of a stick insect."

"Those ugly things? Ugh." Danny cringed as he attempted to stand up, still holding Lindsay. "Watch out." He tapped her thighs as he gestured for them to both stand. "Let's go home. You can get a nice long shower, I'll make dinner and after a nice, long hug from Lucy I can make good on that promise to make you feel better. How does that sound?"

"So long as you're naked," she smirked as she stood up from where she'd been sat on Danny's lap and took his hand to help him up. "I'm in."

"Good," he smiled as he stood and squeezed her hand in reassurance. "Everything will be okay. Tomorrow's a new day and it hopefully won't be as emotionally draining, okay?"

She nodded as she tucked herself into Danny's side. He let go of her for a second as he picked up her pristine gym bag and looped it over his shoulder along with his own worn and tatty gym bag. After they were secure on his shoulder, he retook Lindsay's hand and pulled her into his side.

Hearing her sigh, Danny turned his face down to the crown of her head as he led her out of the empty gym.

"Hey, listen," he said softly as he stopped them and turned her to face him. "I can't promise to solve all of your problems, but I sure as hell promise you won't have to solve them alone."

"I know," she smiled softly as she stood on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his nose. "I love you for being you; thanks for coming to save me from myself."

"You don't gotta thank me for that, Montana. There isn't anywhere else I'd rather be than wiping away your tears."

Letting out a breath she hadn't known she had been holding, she felt the emotions and the anger she'd been feeling slip away as she crossed the threshold of the gym door. Things weren't completely fixed in her heart, but the pieces had been put back together.

And as long as she didn't have to face her worries and heartache alone, then she figured that things, like Danny insisted, might just be okay.

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**There we have it, another oneshot done and dusted. I hope you guys liked it. I'd love to know what you thought... let me know! Thanks for reading! :) **


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